this moment

{this moment, a soulemama tradition}

A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week.  A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

murmur, murmur

So much for my goal of blogging more often -- but I have an excuse!  We have had a run of bad luck -- not just coming in threes, but going on and on, day after day, for more than two weeks!  Nothing catastrophic, mind you, I am thankful and aware of how nice our lives are, however it was starting to feel like we were slightly cursed:

• old van breaks down
• kitchen cupboard falls off and can't be reattached because everything is stripped
• vacuum stops sucking
• other kitchen cupboard falls off because the #$? kids are always leaning on them no matter how many times I say not to -- blast them!
• have to return ipad to ISU (my precious)
• Phin climbs up on top of dresser and pulls down hanging shelf, breaking everything on it!
• my back goes out -- can't sit, walk, hold baby, stuff like that
• our new van gets rear ended
• the computer won't turn on at all -- officially disconnected from the world
• Phin gets stomach flu (Sunday)
• Lucy gets stomach flu (Monday)
• Mom and Archie get stomach flu (Tuesday) -- I was down and out without netflix or anything -- I know, it was like a nightmare!  And Archie lost some of his cheek bulk, so, so, sad.  It was, however, heavenly to just lay in bed with my baby all day napping and cooing to each other...

But now it's Thursday and I have confidence in sunshine, that spring will come again, and that we'll all feel right as rain!  Things are coming together: we traded in the van, although it's sad to see the two van era come to an end; the computer was an easy fix and is back on the desk (it looked so sad and empty); the vacuum is still under warranty and will be back in two weeks (!); no one has vomited in almost 24 hours; (update: I think Ella is down...); I completely removed the cupboard doors and put up pillow cases -- anything is better than seeing inside the cupboards; I read a book -- amazing how much time that ipad was sucking up; the new van should be able to be mended pretty easily; and I went to the chiropractor yesterday morning for the second time this week. 


Speaking of curses, Ibby informed us that she made a deal with Rumplestiltskin and since all magic comes with a price we were paying for it!  That explains everything.


::Archie month 5

hair-y karey

Since the baby hit about 3 months old my hair has been falling out in droves (does that make sense?  a LOT).  As a result, it is so thin and difficult to make it look nice.  For the past few weeks I've been using hot rollers -- yes, I did have a dusty collection way in the back of the linen closet -- which has helped, but after a few hours it looks limp and sad.  No one wants to look pathetic... so I've been thinking about cutting it all off and then we started watching the show "Once Upon a Time" and Mary Margaret's hairstyle is so cute it inspired me to just go ahead and do it!  Well, I wanted to look like this:

And instead I look like this:

It took me a while to find her picture, but aren't you glad I did?  Remember her?  Funny story about this, I remember watching this movie on t.v. with my sister, Ellen, when I was six and it made the most tremendous impression on me -- imprisoned for 25 years for a loaf of bread! -- and then when I was in high school I picked up Les Miserables and there were Jean Valjean and Cosette, like long lost friends -- I had had no idea what the story was called.  Anyway, I digress, but the fact is, all I can think of when I look in the mirror is that I wanted to look cute and instead I look like poor, destitute Fantine.  It even sticks up in the same places.  All I need now is a stained, gray nightgown to complete the pretty picture.  I thought the hairstylist knew what I was talking about, but all around it is much too short, much too much like a boy haircut, and very choppy.  Aaagh!  And $40 later I still look pathetic, lovely.

this moment

{this moment, a soulemama tradition}

A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week.  A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

order envy

It seems like every year at this time magazines are brimming with advice on how to be more organized (yes, this means that I have succumbed to subscribing to those  again, which is not helping my cluttering ways (woes?)), but I can't help but get all excited as they regurgitate the same information over and over -- use baskets! transform a closet into an office! label everything! hide everything! get rid of everything!  I can do that!  Except that I can never find baskets that fit in those spaces, and I don't have a closet to transform, wouldn't that be awesome?  And I seem to have a labeling disability since I've had two dozen matching spice jars waiting for me to fill them and label them for at least two years -- I even found a template for stickers to apply to their lids, but haven't managed to buy the right paper at an office supply store.  And I'd love to hide everything, but that takes us back to the extra closet issue, and I'd really love to get rid of everything, but as nice as that sounds it isn't completely reasonable since we acquired those things for a reason and use at least some of them occasionally (14 pairs of baby legs, mmmm).  Sigh!  


I did, however, tackle one very troublesome spot.  More than a spot really -- my whole bedroom!  I like my room to be serene, a place to get away from the chaos and bedlam, so I've painted it a calming color and try to keep it tidy, but recently we added yet another human being to the mix and sadly, there wasn't really anywhere to stuff him and his paraphernalia (cloth diapers, muslin blankets, baby legs!) besides our room.  Last spring I went through a brief period of obsession about dressers, but quickly realized that we didn't really have room for a dresser, and not only that, someone was going to leave within a year and then we wouldn't really need the extra furniture.  I won't go into the details of who might be leaving the nest, it's really just too sad to mention (or even contemplate for that matter).  So, knowing in the back of my mind that we would really only have to get through one year I decided to just use baskets for the baby's clothes, diapers, burp rags, blankets, shoes, wipes, toys (whew!  babies have a lot of c?!#) -- without remembering that although those things may be tiny and adorable, they still take up quite a bit of space and after a few weeks my bedroom was anything but tranquil and serene -- it looked a lot like a baby store had thrown up in there!  What to do?  My lovely next door neighbor is expecting a baby and she bought some storage with baskets from Ikea and is using the top for a changing table -- Hallelujah! I could practically feel the breeze from the angels flying above my head!  It was exactly the thing for my conundrum and can be used in other parts of the house later.

She has one big shelf with eight openings, but I bought the two with four so that it can be more flexible later.  They hold everything and I have never had a changing table before!  I have always changed my babies' diapers on the floor, but I have gotten way too old for that kind of nonsense -- I can barely get all the way up by myself let alone while holding someone -- so that is an added luxury.  I have dreamed up so many different ways of using it in the future I just might have to get some more.

I guess "they" were right -- putting everything in baskets!  and hiding everything!  really does work.  Now if I can just find big enough baskets for the children.  I've already labelled them.

off with a BANG!

A few years ago I saw that some people were choosing a word to be a theme, as it were, for the year.  I thought that was a great idea and chose one for that year, but haven't done it since.  Last week I started getting so excited for the new year -- fresh start, clean slate, new resolve!  And thought I should come up with a word again, but, alas, the only word I could come up with was "Bleh."  Not very inspiring.


For a New Year's surprise we thought it would be fun to go on a little trip and so we very spontaneously went to the Wisconsin Dells for Monday and Tuesday.  I guess we are true Midwesterners now!  We stayed at Great Wolf Lodge and the kids played in the indoor water park for hours and hours.  The trip up there was a little laborious as we stopped for frequent potty and nursing breaks, and I got a mild toothache from gritting my teeth while Charles careened up the freeway, but other than that we had a grand time.  So that was the good BANG.


The bad BANG was that on the second day of the new year when I was so determined to be a new and better person I not only ate way too many chips, but I did something terrible to someone.  I forgot that we had piano lessons on Monday.  I didn't remember on Friday night when we made our reservations.  I didn't remember on Saturday when I bought supplies.  I didn't remember on Sunday when we packed our bags.  I didn't remember on Monday when we raced each other down the water slides.  I didn't remember until I saw a phone message from our teacher at 11:30 that night and I groaned as I listened to her annoyed voice.  I decided to call her in the morning, but she beat me to it.  First thing in the morning I saw that it was her and reluctantly said hello.  She asked if we were alright and I said yes, we had just spontaneously decided to go out of town.  Then she asked if I had offended her in some way.  What?  Like I completely forgot out of malice?  LIke I did remember, but didn't care that I was making someone drive to my house and wasn't going to be there?  No, no, I just forgot!  It was a holiday, Matthew decided to take some time off (he still worked up there), and when we're off schedule I sometimes get confused about time.  She told me that she had left a family gathering to come to my house and could've spent more time with her sister who lives in Virginia.  That is so frustrating!  I totally understand why she would be upset!  She then said this had happened before and how could we make sure it didn't happen again?  I remembered that when I had a four day old baby the kids went to the children's museum and weren't there for their lesson.  Sorry!  I think the only way to make sure it doesn't happen is for her to stop teaching us, not that I want her to.  She is incredibly nice and it is wonderful that she comes to our house.  That might be part of the problem, that I don't have to think about going somewhere so I forget -- I am often slightly surprised when I see her at the door -- but I miss other things, too, like orthodontist appointments, picking up kids, etc. so she shouldn't take it personally.  I got off the phone with her, crying, and yelled at my family, "Did anyone remember that we had piano lessons?"  No one did, but it fell on my shoulders, of course.  


At any rate I just felt so badly about the whole thing!  I walked around the entire second day at the resort with a sick feeling in my stomach wondering what I could have done differently because I didn't do anything on purpose to be so incredibly rude.  And the only conclusion that I could reach is that I'm just lame.  No excuses there, just truth.  And I do want to do and be better, but sometimes the list of my faults seems too overwhelmingly extensive.  Where do I even start with resolutions for the new year?  Procure a new brain, if possible?
Bleh.