oops, there goes another notch in the mommy pedestal

Yesterday, two completely amazing things happened.  I'm just kidding, actually two very mundane things happened -- two of the many unremarkable things that added together comprise my full and, dare I say, intoxicating life.  I've often thought of what it would be like if my life was on t.v. like a season of '24.'  Now she's ironing; putting in a load of laundry; ooh, now she's starting dinner -- what will it be?  The suspense!  It would be very compelling I'm sure.


So the first thing was that I forgot to go somewhere.  I know!  I never do things like that because my mind is like a steel trap and I remember everything.  I don't even have to write things down on my calendar -- the one I especially bought to keep everyone's schedule in order, with special color coded labels for each person, the usually completely empty one -- because my most very special talent is keeping track of time.  Oh, except for last week when I forgot to take Charles to the orthodontist, to make up an appointment from January (which we also missed, but in my defense, I didn't forget that one -- I called the school and his #$@! teacher didn't give him the hall pass and let him out so I was waiting helplessly in the parking lot for way too long) and now they can't see him until March 17th (they're obviously way overbooked!) so his teeth aren't reaching their ultimate straight conclusion for at least two months longer than might have been necessary.  The orthodontist office even e-mailed and called me with reminders and I still didn't make it.  What do they have to do?  Or like Thursday evening dance class which I forget every single week, but then remember at the very last minute (if it counts as remembering that little girls yell "Mom, don't we have dance right now?" and we rush over and fortunately Miss Janet consistently starts class 15 minutes late -- like clockwork).  Let's not dwell on what I have forgotten in the past and just talk about the latest faux pas.  So I knew going in that my schedule would be a little different because my friend asked me to watch her son and then go to her house afterward for lunch and the thing I needed to remember was to go to Lulu's school and help conduct a reading group at 12:50 -- which I have done for the last few weeks.  I was so worried about the change in my routine that I even told my friend a few days ago and she very kindly put it on her own calendar to help remind me, which I thought was going a little overboard, actually writing it down and everything.  As Lucy left for school, she called, "Mom, don't forget to come!"  Hah.  Why is she telling me that?  Did I forget the other weeks?  No.  I reassured her that I would never do such a thing and sent her off.  Well, I had woken up with a terrible headache and my friend said she would find another babysitter, but not before saying, "And don't forget to go to the school at 12:50."  Ha, ha -- thanks, I won't forget.  My day had suddenly changed course so Phin and I puttered around, did some yoga, had lunch with my husband, checked my e-mail -- and the phone rang.  I looked at the number and didn't recognize it, but decided to bite the bullet and just answer it.   This is a new thing for me.  In the past, I only liked to answer the phone if I knew who it was, but since I got my new calling so many people call me, and if I don't answer I have to actually call them back, so I have now limited the calls I don't answer to unrecognized numbers with different area codes.  Just think, when we were young we never knew who was going to be on the end of the line and we just answered the phone cold -- so bold, so brave -- like pioneers heading into unchartered territory!  So I picked up the phone and I hear this sweet little voice, "Mom?  Are you coming?"  Ack!  It was 1:00 already and I.had.forgotten.  I was wearing funny yoga clothes so I ripped them off and pulled on something more suitable, grabbed the boy, and ran to the school to arrive at 1:08.  We still had 20 minutes to scramble and  try to repair my tarnished reputation in the eyes of a 10 year old.  I'm so lame.


Well, that riveting tale took up so much space that I will have to save the other thing for tomorrow.  That way you can give it the attention it deserves.