Sunday Speculation

Sitting in a church meeting and not understanding anything can be quite painful.  The time passes so so slowly and the kids (and I) get very antsy.  This past week I decided to start reading the Book of Mormon in Spanish because I thought it might help me learn some church-y words and aid in my "learning the language endeavors."  So far, it has done neither of those things since I can't seem to retain new words, but it has helped me read the familiar stories with new eyes.  Every year I try to come up with a word to focus on -- and usually it is a word that finds me!  Last year, it was Love.  Everywhere I turned, there it was, in books, movies, articles, people... Usually, the words I've chosen tag along into the next year so I have quite a collection at this point.  This year, the idea of non-attachment, or detachment, is my focus -- perhaps there is a better single word, but I haven't found it yet.  Already, I've had different aspects of the idea screaming at me from all directions and it was no different as I was reading in Nefi this past week.  Lehi and his family leaving absolutely everything behind really struck me -- their house, their land, their gold and precious things -- everything except for their family and provisions.  It could be more potent because, in a way, that is what we've done for a bit.  We're here with just a few things and we're really fine!  Hopefully when we go home I can take a better look at the things around me and let go of some non-essentials.  Or else I'll be so happy to see my things that I'll become extra attached!  It could go either way, haha!  Another aspect of the idea of non-attachment is to not be too dependent on the outcome of any situation -- I'm terrible about this!  So I'm trying to concentrate on simply being in the moment and observing what is happening around me.  This activity has helped immensely at church!  Once I let go of what I wanted to happen, it was much more enjoyable and we've really met the nicest people!  I've been going with Archie, so that is definitely the fun way to go.

The girl holding his hand kept yelling over and over, "Estoy loca!"  and she was completely crazy!  She kept hurling herself on the floor and the kids kept laughing and laughing.  The poor 22 year old teacher had no control whatsoever, but the sun was shining and the kids were happy.  We all let go of our expectations, let some nice love marinate around the room, and it was great.

Sunday Speculation -- pain in the neck

My neck has been hurting since last Wednesday.  I twisted my body really strangely while I was cleaning the bathroom and spied a spider behind the toilet and suddenly my neck just started spazzing out!  The pain comes and goes and actually this morning is feeling much much better, but it made me realize all the amazing things our necks do so I wrote a poem:

Ode To My (aching) Neck

Bow to accept the warm embrace
Of tiny arms, so fair of face.
Bend for prayer and meditation,
Feeling deeply, and submission.

Turn to hear the cadence joyful
Of my life, the flowing cupful.
To catch a glimpse of fleeting beauty
And watch for danger, as my duty.

Arch to give laughter ample space
And welcome sunlight on my face.
To kiss my love so long and slow
And search for stars that blink and glow.

A conduit for response, command
From head to heart and heart to hand.
Nourishment swallowed, breath exhaled,
My voice intoned in whisper and wail.

A pillar bearing heavy weight
Of all my thoughts, both small and great.
The pedestal of my whole being,
The noble base of all my seeing.

Sunday Speculation -- yoga at church

A couple of weeks ago in church I was so restless.  And so so cold.  Why?  Why must church buildings always be kept at such a frigid temperature?  Is it a symptom of the male-centric position taken in other parts of the institution that only those wearing a three piece suit are catered to?  There are women with bare legs and babies -- babies, people!  So after sitting through Sacrament meeting there I was, sitting once again, in Sunday School.  It has been years since I haven't had a calling second hour so I'm not used to having to sit in one place for that long.  And my knees were bouncing up and down, attempting to create some semblance of warmth in the freezing tundra that is the relief society room.  I look around and see that everyone else seems to be sitting still and calmly, but then I see her -- my kindred spirit!  She's moving and contorting her body in all the ways that my body is yearning to and I watch her, fascinated, as she moves through one yoga pose after another.  She starts with a little downward dog to get things loosened up and then some squats, mmm that must feel nice.  Then she curls up into child pose for a while -- efficiently stretching and keeping warm!  Then she turns over for a perfect example of happy baby, waving her legs in the air whilst holding onto her little toes.  Perfect, because, of course, she is a baby and has license to behave in that manner in public!  I, however, do not and was left there to simply watch with envy.  And then to start imagining... everyone in the room just getting up and moving in every which way they felt compelled.  Listening to their inner voice, responding to the physical and spiritual prodding that one can only hear when the logical mind is turned off.  Ha!  It would be delightful!  And the imagery of all of the old and/or fat fuddy duddies jumping up and doing yoga poses got me through another hour of Sunday School, yay!