burrs in my saddle

Is it just me, or are a lot of people completely irritating?  It is probably just me.  Me, the belly, and the temperature.  Would you like to hear some examples from the past few days? (Why, yes, please!)


At swimming lessons I was told by the director that my kids could use kickboards and other toys in the baby pool, as she pointed out where they were located.  So, every time we go we grab a couple of things to use and then put them back when we're finished.  Last week we made our usual trip to the absolute opposite side of the pool (very arduous for me, keep in mind, since it is very far and extremely hot in there since it is indoor and we're baking under the skylights) to get some things and I hear someone yelling at me.  I turn around in confusion and see an older lady instructor, in the middle of teaching a lesson, screaming at me that I can't use the kickboards.  I kind of shout back that we're just taking it back to the baby pool to be a boat. She says, "No can do, they're dangerous if you don't use them right -- they're only for swimming laps."  I look down and see that I am in my swimming suit and will be right next to Phin in the pool, if she is really worried about his safety, she doesn't need to be.  I decide not to push it and move on and ask him if he'd like to choose a noodle.  Then I hear someone yelling at me again.  Really?  I turn around and she screams, "Those are only for kids taking lessons.  You can't use those at all."  I get up some gumption and tell her that the director told me herself that I could use those things, but she just yelled back so I simply grabbed Phin's hand and stalked off.  I can't compete with such obnoxiousness.  I don't know her, I don't want to talk to her, her students are probably drowning while she's worried about what I'm doing, I'm nine months pregnant...  Easily cowed is what I am.


Next.  We need a car with eight seats so we have spent the last few months trying to locate a good deal on a used minivan -- to no avail!  There are no good deals out there at all, so we have come to the conclusion that it would probably be the best idea to just buy new since they're not losing their value.  This is a new path for us so we were a little giddy as we traipsed down to the Toyota dealership, armed with information, to ask some questions and maybe go for a test drive.  We walk in and there's a guy behind a desk.  We wait for him to look up.  Wait, wait.  Finally he asks what we're interested in.  A minivan. "You and everyone else," he replies charmingly.  "Well, you can go out to the lot, I think there's one unlocked."  Gee, thanks.  So we go out and look around, there isn't one unlocked, no one comes out to talk to us, we decide to leave.  The guy never got up from behind his desk!  Hello, we'd like to spend $30,000, do you mind?  This town is crazy when it comes to customer service.


Third.  I was at the pool.  We like to go in the late afternoon, early evening, because it isn't as crowded or as hot.  It was about 5:15 and I look over and see a mom say to her little boy, "Close your eyes" and then proceed to spray his face with sunscreen.  He was screaming!  And she was just going for it.  And I was shaking my head.  1. Can't you put some into your hand and gently put some on his face, carefully avoiding his eye area?  2. It is quite late in the day, do you realize how slim his chances are for being sunburned at this time?  3.  Would you rather be slightly tan or BLIND?


Five minutes later I was playing in the pool and see a cute little family consisting of parents and 18 month old, or so, twin girls.  Then I hear them yell out their girls' names:  "Ila, don't go too far!"  Oh, that's pretty.  "Grayson, stay over here!"  What?  Is that not a boys name, meaning son of Gray or something?  And I as observe more closely I see that favored, little Ila has blonde curly hair, and poor misused Grayson has straight, nondescript brown. Were we thinking?  It is like a complex waiting to happen!  It's probably spelled Graysyn.  Blech!


I think I need to have this baby.

our story... is depressing

You know it's bad when your pregnancy center update says, "Your baby: week 1."  Tell me all about that, I'd love to know more.  This happened with Phin, too and I never could convince them that I was still pregnant.  I guess no one goes past their due date anymore, even though technically full-term is 38 to 42 weeks.  Today I took the kids to the children's museum and someone asked me when I was due.  I said I was past due and she started going on and on about how she was sure I was begging my doctor to induce, etc.  I said no, I'd been induced once and never wanted to do that again.  She then told me how she had never gone longer than two weeks before her due date and she was so uncomfortable, blah, blah, blah.  Like I'm not uncomfortable - ha!


On Sunday evening the Nauvoo pageant core cast put on a performance here at ISU called "Our Story Goes On."  I thought it was going to be like the pageant and include church history, but it really had no church songs or anything and was instead about families.  It started with a woman having a baby, comparing her experience to her mother and grandmother before her, which is a theme I cherish, then it moved on to young parenthood, children leaving, parents dying -- you know, life.  Real, down and dirty, life and I was literally (not metaphorically) bawling and thinking "life sucks."  And I don't say that lightly because I abhor that word, okay?  You can get all excited about a new baby, but you know it will last all of about one minute so what is the point?  I kept trying to get control of myself, especially because I've got Phin staring up at my face, completely distraught, "Mommy sad?"  "No," I reply through my tears, "Mommy is fine," as I shakily try to smile, but then they start singing Sunrise, Sunset and I am off again.  You can see the lyrics here if you, too, would like a good cry.  I think about Ella -- when did she get to be a beauty?  And Charles -- when did he grow to be so tall?  They were toddlers last week!  And I have regrets.  And then you mix all the emotion in with the contrasting thoughts of some days just being so long and tortuous.  And then a whole part about parents growing older and returning to see their families again in heaven.  My oh my.  I feel like I have my finger in so many pies.  Did we really shout for joy when we heard about this plan?  I don't know ...


So I thought of a great retort when people ask me how I'm doing.  And they're not just saying how are you, they're saying how ARE you, all inflected and sympathetic.  I thought I would just say, "Great!  Great with child, that is."  Wanh, wah.  Matthew didn't think it was funny either.

Up(due)dates

There are a variety of reasons I haven't written for a while: We've been gone, it's summer and there is usually someone who wants to be on the computer, there hasn't been anything else too disgusting to report (isn't the theme fear factor?), I'm lazy...  That about covers it.  I've been trying to get everything squared away before the baby comes.  I always do that, thinking that for the next year I won't be able to do anything, and then, surprisingly enough, find that I actually can leave the house with a baby and usually have a bit more energy than I do while pregnant.  But with school starting so soon afterward I've been trying to get all the school registration, school shopping, physicals, etc. finished so we won't be running around at the last minute.  I don't think I ever shared the hilarious story of Lucy getting her finger pricked to check her iron levels.  Lucy was trying her best to look the other way and ignore what was happening, but the nurse kept talking about how much blood was coming out until it finally started having an effect and I noticed that Lucy was as white as a sheet.  I quickly told her to lie down, but the nurse just grabbed her finger and kept squeezing.   It was too late -- Lucy threw up all over the table.  I ran over to help her, but started gagging and apologizing about how I was more sensitive because I'm pregnant, then I looked over and saw that Ibby was completely green so I opened the door and repeatedly asked her if she was going to lose it, gesturing toward the bathroom.  In the meantime, the nurse was merely clearing away her tools and then reluctantly handed me some paper towels as her halfhearted effort in helping me clean up Lucy's mess.  I did my best to clean off the table, telling Lucy to stay where she was until she didn't feel dizzy, Ibby wandered back in and laid down on the floor, Phin just looked baffled by all the uproar, and I sat down and surveyed the triage scene.  No one came back in to check on us, no one offered to help me clean up anything, no one cared at all.  Finally we slunked out of the office, with Lucy throwing up again on the way home.  Phin thought it was all very exciting and keeps talking about it.  The other night he came in my room and kept repeating what I thought was "I falling off."  I couldn't understand, but he finally grabbed my hand and pulled me into the bathroom where he proceeded to throw up.  Ahh, "I frowing up."  Wow.  My only child who can successfully make it to the toilet with nary a mess anywhere else.  I think he just ate something funny because he wasn't sick at all.  I guess that story was pretty gross.  I should post a warning on my blog.


So we are having such a nice summer.  Someone mentioned the other day that school was starting in less than a month and I started my annual moan about how I hate school and they said that I was the only mother they'd ever met who felt that way.  I know that a lot of my friends feel the same way that I do.  I am DREADING school and how we'll have three separate start times, my husband will be teaching seminary and an 8:00 class so I won't be able to rely on him to help with the morning routine, and I just MIGHT be slightly tired and hormonal.  We can do it!


Eleanor has had a nice little babysitting job and has been having a great time with friends.  On Sunday she was called out of the audience to give a little impromptu talk in sacrament meeting.  She was so calm and just walked up there with a big smile, made a joke about how she was asked to talk about Youth Conference, and gave a great talk.  We were very proud of her.  (If it had been me, there might have been more mention of vomit).  That evening we went with her to get her patriarchal blessing.  What a wonderful experience that was!  We all felt the spirit very strongly.  On the way home we asked her what her impressions were and she said, "I'm just relieved he didn't say that I already knew my future husband."  Whew!


Charles is also babysitting this summer and doing a great job.  He registered and paid for himself to run a 15K a few weeks ago and ran it in 1 hour and 1 minute, coming in 55th out of 800 people.  He runs in the morning and evening and won't eat any sugar.  We always knew he got obsessed about things, and are glad it is now something a little more productive than Runescape was when he was 11.


Lucy and Ibby find amazing things to do every day.  They always have some grand scheme going on whether it be an art project, dressing up, or barbiepollyamericangirl world.  And they entertain Phin to boot.  I couldn't be happier.


Phin is just super cute.  He loved seeing his grandparents and keeps talking about them.  And everything he says is funny.  A couple of days ago we were out driving and the car next to us had a dog sticking his head out the window, looking up with his mouth open.  Phin said, "Mom, that doggie is eating the sky."


As for me, I'm not making many plans.  Waiting, waiting, slightly apprehensive, but getting more ready and closer to surrendering -- willing to do whatever it takes.  Still haven't thought of a name or packed a bag so perhaps I should get on that.

the mystery of the malodorous bedchamber

It was a night much like other nights, in which I had gotten up multiple times to use the loo. Every time I returned to my bedroom I was hit by a horrible stench.  After a moment, it would lose its potency, but every time I left and returned I would notice it again.  I thought it must be something in the laundry basket since children as a whole can be a smelly bunch, so first thing in the morning I removed the whole thing... but the smell was still there.  I began to investigate and finally moved a bag of clothes behind my door and found a wet diaper (Phin still wears one at night, no it wasn't that old) which hadn't quite made it to the trash bin.  Aha!  That must be it.  It couldn't have been there very long, but it has been rather warm, so that explains the smell.  I quickly took it downstairs, but when I next was in my room... the smell was still there.  I scrubbed and scrubbed the floor where I had found the  offending item, then I sprayed the whole room down with air freshener.  That would help for a bit, but after a time it was obvious that... the smell was still there.  Every day for three days I would try something new, but nothing was working, I even lifted up the recliner as best as I could alone, but only found some stray legos.  Could one little diaper do so much damage that even the very walls had absorbed the stink?  On Saturday we decided to take the room apart little by little.  I would sweep the dust bunnies away while Matthew scrubbed the floors and walls with something stronger... but the smell was still there. I looked around and couldn't see what could possibly be so fragrant.  My room really isn't that full of stuff so it just didn't make sense.  Last thing, Matthew took off our mattress and box springs and we were both pleasantly surprised by how clean under our bed was.  I washed all of the bedding, even the bedskirt, and we sprayed down every inch of the room with febreze.  Even with all of those masking chemicals it truly seemed like the smell was getting worse and not better.  Charles came in to help Matthew put the bed back together, first the box springs and then the mattress which had been propped against the wall.  It started to slide forward pulling the carpet out from under the recliner with it.  "AAAAAACK!"  I shrieked, "There's a dead mouse over there!"  And so there was.  It had been under the carpet, under the recliner, and we had probably walked over (and ON) it many a time in our quest to solve the mystery.  Ewww!  Ella said that our cat must really consider us her masters since she brought the mouse to us, to which my husband replied, "If it is really my cat, then that means I can just get rid of her."  I am sure that she offered it to us as a devoted oblation, but no thank you very much.  Matthew swept it up and took it out and just like that -- poof!  The smell had vanished.  All day yesterday we kept talking about how lovely our room smells now, but it still makes me want to move to a different house a little bit.


There!  Isn't that gross?

that's what I love about sundays

Sundays have gotten to be very long days in so many ways.  I had to be at church two hours early for ward council in which we were talking about activities to encourage unity.  The elders quorum president then told about how right after the boundaries changed there was a game night and he realized that Matthew and I weren't  that weird after all and that since then we have gotten together a few times even though there is a generation gap.  I gasped and exclaimed, "You just called me weird and old in one single sentence!"  Generation gap?  He is like eight years younger than me!  Oh my.  I guess I am getting old.  When I told Matthew about it he said it probably just seems that way to him since we have kids that are a lot older.  Okay, fine.


The comments kept coming, but the pregnancy remarks I am much more used to than the age ones.  Here are some things that were said to me just yesterday, in order of appearance:


"Hi there, skinny!"  (from an 80 year old man)
"Are you having a baby or did you just swallow a watermelon seed?"  (yes, Syndy, the same guy)
"Are you in labor?  You look really close."
"Are you having triplets?"
"Do you need someone to bring you dinner?  You look SO uncomfortable!  I mean, really, I have NEVER seen anyone look as uncomfortable as you do right now."


Listen people, I still have seven weeks to go until my due date, and probably closer to nine weeks to go until the baby decides to make its appearance.  Things hadn't gotten this bad with my last pregnancy until I actually had the gall to attend church for the two weeks after my due date.  I try to still look cute and be friendly and didn't realize I was emanating pure and unadulterated misery, but I really am not going to be able to handle attending church if people can't just shut their trap!  Matthew suggests that I just take Sunday bed rest for the duration.  Not a bad idea at all.


One other funny thing that happened at church was that someone came up to me and asked if I had signed the paper she had put in my box.  "What box?"  I asked innocently.  Apparently I have a cubby in the clerk's office and have had no idea for over six months.  She showed me where it was and there were all sorts of goodies -- some quite out of date.  I am truly lame.


Oh, and I would just like to say "You're welcome," to everyone for being the cause of the temperature dipping to a mild and lovely 75˚.  All it took was for us to invest quite a chunk of money in some air conditioners and the weather complied almost immediately.  Happy to do it.

it's too d**n hot

Don't judge me!  It really is!  And the worst time is at night when part of my body can be cooled by the ceiling fan, but the other side is cooking on the bed.  I roll over, drenched on one side, my hair sticking to my neck, and feeling an awful lot like a dirty dishrag.  I wasn't too worried about the summer because we have always been fine as long as we stay near a fan, but I am beginning to suspect that people were right about pregnancy being different (it also isn't supposed to be 100˚ the first week in June, is it?).  I was just reading something last week about how our bodies are the baby's only cooling system.  Yes, normally I'm not much of a perspirer.  I was also reading about how baby's head being down, which what's-his-name's is, send all of the blood flowing there and is so good for the rapid brain development which is going on right now.  I am continually amazed by how intricate and well thought out the whole process is -- awesome!  


So back to my complaining.  It is incredibly hot and ridiculously humid so we went out yesterday to buy some window AC units.  I have rebelled against getting something in the past, not because I enjoy being smug and self-righteous like with cloth diapers, but because we really are okay and I think it is better for our bodies to adjust to the temperature.  Plus it must be saving us money which is always something I enjoy.  But this summer it really is time.  No one is sleeping well.  The last two mornings Phin has woken up in the wee hours and crawled into our bed, draping his hot little body across my stomach -- uncomfortable in so many ways!   Matthew was such a good husband and researched the best brands to buy on Consumer Reports.  We bought two little ones for upstairs and one larger one for the main floor.  We got home all giddy thinking about how delicious the cool air would be, feeling calm by the assurance of the salesman that they would be easy to install, but on opening the box reading, " blah, blah, blah, support the unit, blah, blah, blah, drill, blah, blah."  It wasn't long before we realized that we needed to call in reinforcements since we are bound to do something wrong by ourselves.  Our go-to guy didn't answer the phone, but we're crossing our fingers for something to happen before another wretched night is upon us.  Not that I want to wish away the summer.  I don't at all.  At yoga our teacher was talking about how we should try to enjoy, or at least be present, in every moment.  Don't do a pose and think how you can't wait for it to be over.  I started thinking about how I do that a lot, especially wanting the baby to just be here, so I am trying to savor and soak things up a bit more.  Instead of moaning when the baby kicks me in the ribs, I like to play name that body part, and instead of mentioning the my kids might want to leave me alone (like I just did so I could finish this post) I am really trying to stop everything and just hang out with them.  Even in discomfort, it really is nice to be aware of how alive we are!


We had a very nice weekend.  On Saturday we went over to Nauvoo for my friend's daughter's wedding.  It was all so lovely -- I love temple sealings.  It was very hot, however, and when we did a session in the afternoon I had to roll down my socks, put my dress at my knees, fan myself with the name card, try not to get too sleepy (we did leave our house at 5:30), and not think how I couldn't wait for it to be over (a common theme). Then on Sunday we baptized our Isabela Phoebe.  

It was a very thrown together at the last minute affair, but fortunately my friends are facebook addicts and saw the announcement, my daughters were willing (after some strong encouragement) to give talks, another friend shared a baptismal program, and the grocery store had some pretty good cookies so it all worked out.


Yesterday all the kids got haircuts (because it is too darn hot!) and Lucy had enough to donate to Locks of Love again.

Four locks!  No wonder that was a bear to brush through!  Now we're off to swimming lessons and whatever else the day brings.

may I please take a break from may?

I really do like having a blog, but I certainly neglect it sometimes.  And I used to think of all kinds of clever things to write, but right at the moment my brain is mushy.  We have also been very busy as usual.  There seems to be 20 things going on every day.  So far this month I had:

1.  a party to sell Norwex (I don't like doing parties like that, but the products are amazing so I did one so I could get a discount on some things I wanted to buy, but the reason I don't like doing them is because people don't like coming to them and so there weren't very many people there, but the people who did come were utterly lovely in every way and we had yummy food, too)
2. the school carnival (I tried to be helpful)
3. my 8th annual Mother's Day Tea (which I always stress about, but always turns out so nice, but no pictures) 
4. Ibby's birthday party (I tried to keep it non-stressful and then it totally was for some reason.  I actually know the reason, it was the silly person who works at the bead place who didn't explain to the girls that some of the beads cost .10¢ and some of them cost $13 so after they picked stuff out I was running around wildly trying to get them to trade some of them out so that each bracelet didn't cost $120.  I tried to ask her beforehand to tell the kids where they could pick from "Oh, just anywhere" was her reply, erg.  She did apologize later when she saw the chaos and mayhem, but I was just too tired to be very forgiving)
5. the dance recital (which just wouldn't be complete without skanky costumes and really deserves its own post because it was crazy and we kept showing up without everything we needed, like dance shoes, and I was afraid that people are going to think our house looks like a house from Hoarders, but it really doesn't, and they would call over the loud speaker "Would Lucy and Ibby's mom please bring down _____" and I was embarrassed to be me, but the girls said they weren't embarrassed that I was their mother so that was good)
6. Lucy's orchestra concert
7. Ella's choir concert
8. Charles had several track meets (I am a very devoted mother and watched the only two of his races that I saw from the street in my car -- he ran a mile in 4 minutes and 52 seconds!)
9. school field day (once again I tried to be helpful, but Phin kept needing to go potty and it wasn't close to our station, but I was working with a woman who said she had two kids -- Carson and Charlie -- who I assumed were boys, but then when they came over were both girls!  Karsyn is spelled differently than I thought, but really what are people thinking?  There are so many beautiful girls names in the world, stop taking the boy ones!!!)
10. recovering my dining room chairs (which would take most people about an hour, but seems to be taking me two years)
11. various and sundry church events (which for some unknown reason I even have some responsibility for!)
12. planting the garden (people think I'm crazy for putting one in this summer since I'm large and cumbersome, but I think I'm going to want fresh tomatoes and cucumbers more than ever)
13. and then of course there are all the garage sales from which I just can't stay away...  I have had great luck with finding great deals on baby boy stuff so I don't really need any more baby things except for: a new stroller (sit and stand), some new diapers in fruity colors, some muslin baby blankets, a new camera, a laptop, and a car that seats eight.  Not much.

Some pictures from last summer that I just found on my camera
::fourth of july street parade

 ::grandparents visit

:: pure craziness

 ::tired boy

 Now some more recent ones
::school carnival face paint

 ::birthday party

 ::dance recital -- aren't they cute?

 ::they're almost the same size!