debut

I have been meaning to start a journal for some time now. I buy pretty notebooks and nice pens, yet nothing seems to be enough to prod me along. I have decided to change my tactic and plunk some words down online. We will see how this goes...

Last week we saw a funny movie called the T.V. set. There was a character in it that was 8 months pregnant and had the best line about "feeling this whole pregnant thing..." I cannot remember it exactly, because I happen to be 8 months pregnant myself, so such a thing would obviously be impossible, but it got me to thinking about the human condition -- and thus the title of my new blog. At first I was startled by how close her comment came to how I feel all the time and I thought, 'And I thought it was just me.' It made my strange thought validated somehow. But then later, I began to think that it was somehow minimizing my experience, turning it into a cliche. So there is nothing unique or unpredictable about my behavior -- simply the human condition. Kind of depressing in a way, unless you want to be like everyone else. I just finished reading the "Twilight" series. The same thing kept happening as I read those books. I would think, 'Wow, I have felt just that way before!' and then think, 'oh, it wasn't as special or unusual as I thought.'

Rebecca had her baby on Sunday. Always a relief that another baby made it safely into the world! She had been so worried and everything went really well. I cannot help but feel anxious, but I suppose that shows that I am not quite ready, I have to be at the point of absolute surrender, completely apathetic to whatever and however it happens -- just get the baby out! We are very excited. We could not have dreamed up the other kids, so it will be a delight to see the baby's face for the first time and get to know the new personality in our house.