Monday, June 20, 2011

the mystery of the malodorous bedchamber

It was a night much like other nights, in which I had gotten up multiple times to use the loo. Every time I returned to my bedroom I was hit by a horrible stench.  After a moment, it would lose its potency, but every time I left and returned I would notice it again.  I thought it must be something in the laundry basket since children as a whole can be a smelly bunch, so first thing in the morning I removed the whole thing... but the smell was still there.  I began to investigate and finally moved a bag of clothes behind my door and found a wet diaper (Phin still wears one at night, no it wasn't that old) which hadn't quite made it to the trash bin.  Aha!  That must be it.  It couldn't have been there very long, but it has been rather warm, so that explains the smell.  I quickly took it downstairs, but when I next was in my room... the smell was still there.  I scrubbed and scrubbed the floor where I had found the  offending item, then I sprayed the whole room down with air freshener.  That would help for a bit, but after a time it was obvious that... the smell was still there.  Every day for three days I would try something new, but nothing was working, I even lifted up the recliner as best as I could alone, but only found some stray legos.  Could one little diaper do so much damage that even the very walls had absorbed the stink?  On Saturday we decided to take the room apart little by little.  I would sweep the dust bunnies away while Matthew scrubbed the floors and walls with something stronger... but the smell was still there. I looked around and couldn't see what could possibly be so fragrant.  My room really isn't that full of stuff so it just didn't make sense.  Last thing, Matthew took off our mattress and box springs and we were both pleasantly surprised by how clean under our bed was.  I washed all of the bedding, even the bedskirt, and we sprayed down every inch of the room with febreze.  Even with all of those masking chemicals it truly seemed like the smell was getting worse and not better.  Charles came in to help Matthew put the bed back together, first the box springs and then the mattress which had been propped against the wall.  It started to slide forward pulling the carpet out from under the recliner with it.  "AAAAAACK!"  I shrieked, "There's a dead mouse over there!"  And so there was.  It had been under the carpet, under the recliner, and we had probably walked over (and ON) it many a time in our quest to solve the mystery.  Ewww!  Ella said that our cat must really consider us her masters since she brought the mouse to us, to which my husband replied, "If it is really my cat, then that means I can just get rid of her."  I am sure that she offered it to us as a devoted oblation, but no thank you very much.  Matthew swept it up and took it out and just like that -- poof!  The smell had vanished.  All day yesterday we kept talking about how lovely our room smells now, but it still makes me want to move to a different house a little bit.

There!  Isn't that gross?

Monday, June 13, 2011

that's what I love about sundays

Sundays have gotten to be very long days in so many ways.  I had to be at church two hours early for ward council in which we were talking about activities to encourage unity.  The elders quorum president then told about how right after the boundaries changed there was a game night and he realized that Matthew and I weren't  that weird after all and that since then we have gotten together a few times even though there is a generation gap.  I gasped and exclaimed, "You just called me weird and old in one single sentence!"  Generation gap?  He is like eight years younger than me!  Oh my.  I guess I am getting old.  When I told Matthew about it he said it probably just seems that way to him since we have kids that are a lot older.  Okay, fine.

The comments kept coming, but the pregnancy remarks I am much more used to than the age ones.  Here are some things that were said to me just yesterday, in order of appearance:

"Hi there, skinny!"  (from an 80 year old man)
"Are you having a baby or did you just swallow a watermelon seed?"  (yes, Syndy, the same guy)
"Are you in labor?  You look really close."
"Are you having triplets?"
"Do you need someone to bring you dinner?  You look SO uncomfortable!  I mean, really, I have NEVER seen anyone look as uncomfortable as you do right now."

Listen people, I still have seven weeks to go until my due date, and probably closer to nine weeks to go until the baby decides to make its appearance.  Things hadn't gotten this bad with my last pregnancy until I actually had the gall to attend church for the two weeks after my due date.  I try to still look cute and be friendly and didn't realize I was emanating pure and unadulterated misery, but I really am not going to be able to handle attending church if people can't just shut their trap!  Matthew suggests that I just take Sunday bed rest for the duration.  Not a bad idea at all.

One other funny thing that happened at church was that someone came up to me and asked if I had signed the paper she had put in my box.  "What box?"  I asked innocently.  Apparently I have a cubby in the clerk's office and have had no idea for over six months.  She showed me where it was and there were all sorts of goodies -- some quite out of date.  I am truly lame.

Oh, and I would just like to say "You're welcome," to everyone for being the cause of the temperature dipping to a mild and lovely 75˚.  All it took was for us to invest quite a chunk of money in some air conditioners and the weather complied almost immediately.  Happy to do it.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

it's too d**n hot

Don't judge me!  It really is!  And the worst time is at night when part of my body can be cooled by the ceiling fan, but the other side is cooking on the bed.  I roll over, drenched on one side, my hair sticking to my neck, and feeling an awful lot like a dirty dishrag.  I wasn't too worried about the summer because we have always been fine as long as we stay near a fan, but I am beginning to suspect that people were right about pregnancy being different (it also isn't supposed to be 100˚ the first week in June, is it?).  I was just reading something last week about how our bodies are the baby's only cooling system.  Yes, normally I'm not much of a perspirer.  I was also reading about how baby's head being down, which what's-his-name's is, send all of the blood flowing there and is so good for the rapid brain development which is going on right now.  I am continually amazed by how intricate and well thought out the whole process is -- awesome!  

So back to my complaining.  It is incredibly hot and ridiculously humid so we went out yesterday to buy some window AC units.  I have rebelled against getting something in the past, not because I enjoy being smug and self-righteous like with cloth diapers, but because we really are okay and I think it is better for our bodies to adjust to the temperature.  Plus it must be saving us money which is always something I enjoy.  But this summer it really is time.  No one is sleeping well.  The last two mornings Phin has woken up in the wee hours and crawled into our bed, draping his hot little body across my stomach -- uncomfortable in so many ways!   Matthew was such a good husband and researched the best brands to buy on Consumer Reports.  We bought two little ones for upstairs and one larger one for the main floor.  We got home all giddy thinking about how delicious the cool air would be, feeling calm by the assurance of the salesman that they would be easy to install, but on opening the box reading, " blah, blah, blah, support the unit, blah, blah, blah, drill, blah, blah."  It wasn't long before we realized that we needed to call in reinforcements since we are bound to do something wrong by ourselves.  Our go-to guy didn't answer the phone, but we're crossing our fingers for something to happen before another wretched night is upon us.  Not that I want to wish away the summer.  I don't at all.  At yoga our teacher was talking about how we should try to enjoy, or at least be present, in every moment.  Don't do a pose and think how you can't wait for it to be over.  I started thinking about how I do that a lot, especially wanting the baby to just be here, so I am trying to savor and soak things up a bit more.  Instead of moaning when the baby kicks me in the ribs, I like to play name that body part, and instead of mentioning the my kids might want to leave me alone (like I just did so I could finish this post) I am really trying to stop everything and just hang out with them.  Even in discomfort, it really is nice to be aware of how alive we are!

We had a very nice weekend.  On Saturday we went over to Nauvoo for my friend's daughter's wedding.  It was all so lovely -- I love temple sealings.  It was very hot, however, and when we did a session in the afternoon I had to roll down my socks, put my dress at my knees, fan myself with the name card, try not to get too sleepy (we did leave our house at 5:30), and not think how I couldn't wait for it to be over (a common theme). Then on Sunday we baptized our Isabela Phoebe.  

It was a very thrown together at the last minute affair, but fortunately my friends are facebook addicts and saw the announcement, my daughters were willing (after some strong encouragement) to give talks, another friend shared a baptismal program, and the grocery store had some pretty good cookies so it all worked out.

Yesterday all the kids got haircuts (because it is too darn hot!) and Lucy had enough to donate to Locks of Love again.
Four locks!  No wonder that was a bear to brush through!  Now we're off to swimming lessons and whatever else the day brings.

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