So I was officially released from my calling as RS president yesterday and one would think that I would be as pleased as punch, but I am really so sad about it. I guess that proves that I am certifiably insane! I've been crying all day. It just feels so premature, so unfinished, so half-baked... I didn't get my chance to shine and magnify! I just figured out I have an inbox in the clerk's office for pete's sake! We've been joking that I should have been referred to as the interim president the whole time, "I'm just filling in until they find the right person," or as simply the pregnant president since it spanned from the first day I knew until the week he was born. I had so many plans! So many great ideas! And I wasn't going to be pregnant anymore! The bishop claims that I am not being fired, and that it has more to do with Matthew's new calling as early morning seminary teacher + new baby + already having too many kids and he just didn't want to overburden our family when there are plenty of other people in our ward. Fine. Whatever.
The new president is coming over today to get the all the fun "stuff" that is required. All last night I kept dreaming that she was coming to take the baby and I had to pack up all of his clothes and diapers, etc. Matthew said it represents that my true calling is as a mother. Ooh, deep.
Now I have to worry about what is next, but not say the callings I don't want out loud, if you know what I mean.