Monday, August 15, 2011

not my idea

So I was officially released from my calling as RS president yesterday and one would think that I would be as pleased as punch, but I am really so sad about it.  I guess that proves that I am certifiably insane!  I've been crying all day.  It just feels so premature, so unfinished, so half-baked...  I didn't get my chance to shine and magnify!  I just figured out I have an inbox in the clerk's office for pete's sake!  We've been joking that I should have been referred to as the interim president the whole time, "I'm just filling in until they find the right person," or as simply the pregnant president since it spanned from the first day I knew until the week he was born.  I had so many plans!  So many great ideas!  And I wasn't going to be pregnant anymore!  The bishop claims that I am not being fired, and that it has more to do with Matthew's new calling as early morning seminary teacher + new baby + already having too many kids and he just didn't want to overburden our family when there are plenty of other people in our ward.  Fine.  Whatever.

The new president is coming over today to get the all the fun "stuff" that is required.  All last night I kept dreaming that she was coming to take the baby and I had to pack up all of his clothes and diapers, etc.  Matthew said it represents that my true calling is as a mother.  Ooh, deep. 

Now I have to worry about what is next, but not say the callings I don't want out loud, if you know what I mean.


Normal Mom said...

I don't think you got fired either, but I totally know what you mean. I was Primary President for 3 years and I thought I was being let go too early too.
I think you have to realize that you did what the Lord needed you to do, and you may never even know exactly what it was you were put in that position to say or do. But you did it, and now you get to move into a new phase of your life.
I think your ward was lucky to have you, no matter how long. And just think, now you will probably NOT be called as that again because people will say, "But she's been Relief Society President already", they won't add, "...but only for less than a year, sign her up for another tour of duty!"
Thank you for the service you gave. Now go enjoy your baby and your posse of other children. :)

Stacey said...

You shine no matter what calling you have!! Just think how busy you will be getting Ella ready for college this year and managing Lucy's first year of Jr. know the list is endless.

Jen said...

I often feel like I have a calling until I figure out what I am doing and start to like it. Then I get released, so maybe you are just a fast learner! I do think that you have a kind hearted bishop, because not all of them will consider the needs of new moms that way.

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